Video player not working?0:000:000:00SettingsQualityAutoAudioSpeed1×CaptionsOffIf Atheists Ruled The WorldDula TVFunny videos since 2008Thumbs up0Thumbs down0 Share73.3K views Apr 2009Two men recite absurd, verbatim internet forum arguments to illustrate the clash of worldviews. Show transcript0:00You want to open it up, or do I just stop?0:02What is it?0:04Sorry, just a second.0:06All right. Okay.0:07Should I do it for real?0:09I do it.0:10I often debate evolutionists because I believe that they narrow-mindedly and dogmatically accept evolution without questioning it.0:16I really don't care how God did what he did. I know he did it.0:19I can sum it up in 3 words. Evolution is a lie.0:23You know, there's a lot of things in life I've concluded to be wrong without studying them in depth.0:27Evolution is one of them. You know, the fact that I don't know a thing about it doesn't bother me in the least.0:32Everyone knows that scientists insist on using complex terminology to make it harder for true Christians to refute their claims.0:40Take deoxyribonucleic acid, for example. Sounds impressive, right?0:45Have you ever seen what happens when you put something in acid?0:47It dissolves. If our bodies were full of that acid, we'd all dissolve.0:53So much for the theory of evolution.0:55How can anyone believe that humans evolved from monkeys? Here's a few questions for some of you who may believe that.1:01If we did, in fact, evolve from monkeys, how come babies aren't born monkeys?1:06So you think that if no one believed in any religion, there'd be no wars or fighting?1:11I think it'd be worse. I think it'd be way worse. I know if I didn't have God's judgment to fear, I would have killed many, many times.1:17Even Darwin believed his theories were wrong before he died, so why do we still believe them?1:21It's not known whether, uh, God created oil 6,000 years ago when he created the Earth, or whether the coal deposits were developed during Noah's flood 4,000 years ago.1:31It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter at all. What matters is that if you don't believe God created the Earth 6,000 years ago, you're going to hell.1:41Several million years for a monkey to turn into a man? Oh wait, that's right.1:45Monkeys don't live several million years.1:48I'm sorry. Scientists have just shown that mice DNA is more similar to humans than human DNA.1:55So would evolutionists then argue that humans evolved from mice?1:58Probably. The thing is, people can't think for themselves, and they get so confused about reality.2:04That's why people are willing to believe anything a scientist will tell them.2:07Let's, let me see if I can paint you a little picture, you know, if atheists ruled the world.2:14So, uh, atheist son comes home to his mom. Hi, mom. Hey, son.2:21And then the son would probably say something like, hey, mom, I'm gonna go fuck a hooker.2:27No problem, son. Don't be home late. Oh, I might be, because then I'm gonna go smoke pot with my friends, since it's not addictive.2:38Oh, fine with me, son.2:41And then the, the atheist dad would come home. Hi, honey. Hey.2:48Uh, how's your day? Oh, I'm pregnant again. Looks like I'm gonna have to get another abortion, since fetuses aren't actual human life.3:00Oh, no problem, honey. Get as many abortions as you like. Okay, I will.3:05Oh, and don't go in the bedroom because there's 2 gay men fucking in there.3:11Why are there gay men, honey?3:14Because I wanted to watch, I wanted to watch the gay men. And then he would, uh, he wouldn't care.3:19He'd say, okay, that's fine with me. And then probably the atheist neighbor would run in.3:25Quick, there's a Christian outside. Oh, we were coming. And then they'd they'd grab their black robes and their hoods, and they'd run into the street where a Christian would probably be nailed to a big wooden X,3:37being burned at the stake, surrounded by atheists in their hoods and robes.3:42Die, Christian!3:45Die!3:47We claim to be tolerant of all religions except you. We hate you because we're atheists, and we're hypocritical like that because we're atheists.3:58Scary, isn't it?
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