Video player not working?0:000:000:00SettingsQualityAutoAudioSpeed1×CaptionsOffNasa Scientists Plan To Approach Women By 2018Dula TVFunny videos since 2008Thumbs up0Thumbs down0 Share6.7K views Feb 2010NASA scientists hold a press conference to discuss a $900 million mission to meet a woman. Show transcript0:00I'm pleased to announce that NASA has entered the planning stages of a mission to approach that cute girl from the laundromat by 2018.0:07Senior project scientists, Dr. Adam Thompson and Dr. Carson Harper discovered the girl 3 months ago at a Houston area sudden save between dryers 4 and 5, giving her the name Thompson Harper,0:19number 3499102. Dr. Thompson.0:23Thank you. According to our observations, Thompson Harper becomes visible for 70 to 90 minute intervals every Wednesday night.0:29She masses between 30 and 60 kilograms, and her eyes are the color of magnesium iron silicate.0:35She is attractive, and based on observed interactions with laundromat employees, she is not cold or lifeless.0:41The approach will be implemented in 3 phases. 1, planning, which will take an estimated 8 years.0:462, execution, which will take 4 to 12 minutes, and 3, results, which, depending on the success of phase 2, could lead to anything from naked showering together to marriage.0:56The mission will cost an estimated 900 million dollars. A team is in the early stages of development of a joke, which we can use to break the ice.1:05It is a casually humorous observation about how socks seem to disappear in the dryer.1:10The advantages of this topic are twofold. It is specific to the laundromat setting, and if successful, we can transition to level 2, in which we refer to dryers as the black hole for socks.1:22This will allow us to segue seamlessly into talk of space, a topic about which we are extremely comfortable speaking.1:27We also have a dedicated task force developing trendy new clothes for maximum impact upon approach.1:33These projects are on track to be completed by 2015, and when finished, will introduce us to a whole new world of lady interaction.1:39We'll now take questions. Yes.1:42How do you respond to critics who believe the organization is risking another tragedy like the 2002 Girl at Borders bookstore disaster?1:49Well, none of us want to relive that moment.1:51And we've put in place protocols for this mission that should prevent a similar outcome.1:55For example, should the interaction become compromised to an unsalvageable degree, a propulsion ejection system can be deployed, which will launch our men out of the laundromat and clear of any potentially embarrassing situation.2:06If that occurs, we will move on to our backup plan using the Hubble Space Telescope to take higher resolution photos of her, and then masturbating furiously while hating ourselves for it.2:15Yes.2:16Is this mission connected to the other NASA mission to locate and marry Scarlett Johansson?2:20No, that mission has been cancelled. It was found to be infeasible and just stupid, really stupid.2:26Okay, thank you all for coming.
2:52
3:23
1:46
2:00
2:57
3:04
3:09
9:54
0:39
0:20
2:07
2:27