1.4K views Nov 2009
A man performs a comic rap while insisting he wrote it in 1994, years before the events and artists mentioned, before the sketch ends with a nod to Tupac.
0:03 Exclusive is that new Tupac. 0:15 Listen close as life turns its pages. Machiavelli here kicking rhymes for the ages. 0:21 Seeing things in stages, wise words spoken by sages, from Skytel to Blackberry Pages. 0:28 Your crew don't faze us, we'll make your buses pay us. Run up in your spot like CJ from San Andreas. 0:34 I wrote this song a long time ago, a real long time ago. Feel me? 0:41 I wrote this song a long time ago. It was the dopest song I ever wrote in 94. 0:47 What can a nigga do when half the people voted for George W. 0:53 George W. Can't be true. 0:56 Gonna choke him 'cause he's a snitch. I'm talking about George W. 1:00 Smith from City Council. He ran in '93 out in Oakland. You probably didn't hear about him. 1:06 I wrote this song a long time ago, a real long time ago, way before Slim Shady was in demand, way before we dropped baloney on Afghanistan. 1:17 I wrote this song in '94. 1:21 Am I doing this? 1:25 Look around the club, see everyone in the place, showing park love, got a smile on my face. 1:32 The girl in the miniskirt has bad taste 'cause that shirt don't match. 1:36 There's a pudding stain on the back. 1:40 What the fuck is that? It might be doo-doo. 1:45 You in the back, you ate this shit. You bought a gin and tonic, but you didn't even tip. 1:50 And if you hit this table one more time, then the record might skip, might skip. 1:55 I told you, stop hitting the table. 2:00 1994. I'm not alive. 2:06 Thug life. Dave Chappelle, that ain't your wife. 2:12 You kids, go home. It was so a long time ago, a real long time ago, way before Big Seagull had to do a bid, way before Dave Chappelle had two kids. 2:32 Tupac, rest in peace. 2:37 Okay, I will. 
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