Everyday Normal Guy

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Jon Lajoie raps about the humble, boring, and relatable struggles of his everyday life.

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Jon Lajoie presents... Everyday Normal Guy. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. Nothing special about me, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. When I go to the clubs, I wait in line, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. I got six hundred dollars in the bank, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. And my sexual performance is average. I work in customer service for a phone company. I make twelve bucks an hour but that's all I need. I live in a small apartment on a quiet street. I don't go out too much. I like to watch TV. I can't afford a car. I use public transportation. I don't mind. I read till I reach my destination. Sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book. The amount of money I save, the shit is off the hook. And I'm not very good with the women. I'm a pretty shy person and I'm average looking. Last time I had sex was in 2003 and I'm ashamed to admit but it wasn't free. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. I get nervous in social situations, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. I get constipated once a month, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. And I make pretty good spaghetti sauce, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. And I get scared when I go see the dentist. I'm the Pauly Shore of everyday life. Easily forgettable and I'm not very like. I have an according to Jim personality. I'm as entertaining as a fucking STD. If you want to mess with me, I think you probably can, because I'm not confident and I'm weak for a man. I'll just roll up in a ball while you kick me in the back. Yeah, honestly, I probably won't fight back. And I don't have many friends that would back me up. My friend Steve would, but he doesn't look very tough. You want some of this, bitch? If you rarely get laid, put your hands up. If you're not well paid, put your hands up. If you got a pet cat, put your hands up. And if you got a bad back, put your hands up. I hurt my back two summers ago moving a fridge and ever since then it's just it's not the same. You know, it it gets pretty it gets pretty sore. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. My parents are really nice people, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. I'm somewhat afraid of heights, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. I like the show Grey's Anatomy, motherfucker. I'm just a regular, everyday, normal guy. And I'm pretty good at making paper planes. I could do this all day. I could do this all day. I could do this all day.

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