2.5K views Jun 2009
Larry David awkwardly negotiates with a street dealer for an ounce of low-grade marijuana, then struggles to follow instructions during the cash exchange.
0:20 Good afternoon, good afternoon. Uh, 0:24 I couldn't help but notice the, uh, the transaction between you and the, the other gentleman, uh. 0:33 What exactly were you thinking of? 0:36 A little, uh, little weed going, you know, some weed. 0:41 Yeah, I got it, I got it, yeah. You know, first of all, you can calm down a little. 0:45 Sure. 0:46 Just, you know, relax. 0:47 Yeah. No, I'm 0:48 Create the illusion that we're friends talking here, all right? 0:51 What? You kidding me? You know what? You're 100% right. 0:55 That's too much, right? That's not. You're doing fine, all right? 0:58 Just chill out. Well, I can get you an ounce of, like, some real, you know, hydroponic scientific stuff, but that'll run you 500 bucks. 1:07 Hydroponic? 1:08 Yeah. 1:09 I'm not looking for a sound system, my friend. 1:11 Hydroponic. 1:12 You know what I mean? Just looking to get my father a little, a little relief. 1:17 Let's play it safe. I'll give you an ounce of schwag. 1:19 Schwag? 1:20 It'll cost you 200 bucks. 1:23 An ounce of schwag, 200? 1:25 200. 1:26 Is that a fair, fair price you're quoting me there, sir? 1:29 Look, you pay me 200 bucks or go fuck yourself. 1:32 Okay, well. 1:33 Look, I don't need to sell the drugs. The drugs will sell themselves. 1:40 Sure. 1:40 Yeah, forget it. 1:41 No, let's do schwag, schwag, 200. No, no, no. So schwag 200. 1:44 OK, I got it. I got it. So what do we do? 1:47 You got 200? 1:48 Yes, yes. 1:49 All right, take out 200 bucks. 1:51 I'll s- I'll count to 3. Where is it? 1:53 It's right here. 1:54 Let me hold, let me put my hand on it. 1:55 Give me your money, sir. 1:56 One. Hold. I got, you're not letting me put my hand. 1:59 Your hand is on it. 1:59 OK. 1:59 Your hand is on it. All right. 2:01 One, two, three. 2:02 Just see. 2:05 All right, now keep walking. 2:06 OK. Any particular d- direction? 2:08 Just, just, just, just please move. 2:10 Which way? 2:11 Just walk, just walk, just walk. 2:14 Jesus Christ. 2:19 I gotta go this way. 2:20 Just go, just go. 
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