Video player not working?0:000:000:00SettingsQualityAutoAudioSpeed1×CaptionsOffReligion From DannyDula TVFunny videos since 2008Thumbs up0Thumbs down0 Share1.8K views Aug 2009A satirical infomercial pitches religion as a cure for independent thought, touting rituals and community before listing its darker side effects. Show transcript0:01Are you unable to think for yourself? Will you believe anything as long as lots of other people believe it too?0:06Do you enjoy reading the same stuff over and over and over for the rest of your life?0:11Then you need religion. Take your pick, they're all pretty much the same, and in no time you'll get to enjoy all sorts of fun activities, like sitting on your knees and talking to your ceiling,0:21singing songs, dressing up in funny clothes, or starting a bloody centuries-long war with another religion.0:27You'll make lots of new friends, lose all sense of self-determination, and join a throng of literally billions of people just like you.0:34But wait, there's more. Buy into religion today, and we'll include a free one-time offer of our book, Believing in Stuff and Zany Rituals That Make No Sense and Are a Complete Waste of Time,0:45absolutely free. And the great thing about religion is once you get it, you can feel the need to tell everyone you know who doesn't have it how miserable and useless they are and how much less useless and miserable they could be if only they were as smart as you and believed in stuff.0:59So don't delay, get religion for your brain today. Side effects include suicide bombings, unnecessary war, senseless punishment, really annoyingly brainwashed children, getting offended when people make fun of religion,1:09and the occasional sudden realization that everything you've been led to believe is a giant massive lie perpetrated only to keep idiots like you fearful of imaginary gods and under control.
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