1.9K views Mar 2010
A man delivers a profane parody of an Everest College ad, pitching absurd courses, tuition payment options, and a three-month degree while lounging outside a storefront.
0:01 Look at you, man. I see you sitting on the couch about to roll up that big old ball of nasty ass, sticky ass, stemmy ass street bow. 0:09 Ugh, that shit is weak, watching Maury Povich. Hey, which bring me to thought, bitch, I'm not the father. 0:15 Angie, Tammy, Renee, Felicia, me- Michelle, and the little bitch, uh, Fifi, stay on 59, bitch, I'm not, I wore a rubber that night. 0:22 Everest College is accredited by the West Coast Commission of Non-Accredited Schools. 0:26 You can learn anything. They got courses in whatever you want to know. 0:30 Criminology, plumbing, dope chopping, dope cooking, weed transporting, anything. 0:35 Even if you want to go on the other side of the law, you can learn some shit. 0:38 Hey, what's that shit like when you like a junior lawyer? 0:42 Nigga, you mean paralegal? 0:45 Yeah, old smart ass community college nigga like that. Don't you wanna do something with your life? 0:49 All you do is smoke Stribo all day. You don't take care of your kids, nigga. 0:53 Bitch, you strip all. I'm studying gynecanology. Yes, ladies, I specialize in ovarian observations. 1:01 And your boy do free pap smears and mammograms on the 1st and 15th. 1:04 Enrolling in Everest, up my pimp game 2,000%, nigga. There's some cool bitches at this motherfucker, and check this out. 1:10 They all got low self-esteem. You got cool ass black broads, busted down snow bunnies, white stringy hair, dog smelling bitches and shit. 1:18 You got some motherfucking cool ass Latinas with nice asses and lips and titties that's ready to fuck. 1:26 You remember that bad light-skinned bitch Sierra from the commercial? 1:29 The one that kind of looked like Felicia Keys? 1:33 Your boy fucked that bitch, nigga. Nigga trilled shit, I ain't lying. 1:37 Skeeted her up, nigga, all over her face. Nigga, I was dropping balls on that hoe. 1:42 Throw them balls. And if your bread ain't right, don't even trip, 'cause Everest College accepts all forms of payment for your tuition, nigga. 1:49 Real shit, nigga. WIC, EBT, food stamps. My nigga, if you really about your grinding, if you really about your paper, my nigga, you can get your motherfucking bachelor's degree in 3 months, 2:00 nigga. You too can aspire to make minimum wage one day, pimping. 2:04 Fuck the University of Phoenix, nigga. I'm down with Everest, nigga. 2:07 Everest, nigga. Everest, nigga. 
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